Columbia’s Best and Worst

Each week, the Free Times, Columbia’s weekly alternative newspaper, prints what’s on the minds of its readers. “Rant & Rave”  is something to rave about, mostly because each week, Free TImessome of the worst, wisest,and weirdest people chime in, resulting in a pretty fair overview of our community and the people who live here.

So, for those of you who have never been to Columbia, here’s a peek at our fine city from this week’s “Rant & Rave.”  If you live here, you might recognize one of these people. Or even yourself.

THE WORST: What is the United States doing protecting these Cubans and Haitians and stuff like that? They are just coming into our country and destroying it, but our lawyers are protecting them. I saw it on 20/20. And it’s stupid. Americans, we just need to rise up and say, “Forget this. We’re not standing for it anymore.”

THE WISEST: Here is an irony: Everyone seems to be so disappointed with our elected officials, but at every election, the vast majority of incumbents get re-elected. In the Nov. 5 election in Columbia, every incumbent was re-elected. The only change that Columbia voters chose was higher property taxes.

THE WEIRDEST: South Carolina’s employers are no better than the mafia. If any employer pays 25 cents more an hour to get the workers he needs, he runs the risk of sleeping with the fishes tonight. Together, they’re only going to pay so much — and anybody who’s willing to pay more than that is in big trouble.

HONORABLE MENTION: Dear Free Times, I know this is a free publication and all, but y’all gotta do better with Rant & Rave. It was so bad [last] week, I cannot choose one, or even three fools, to make fun of.  What was your theme? “Intemperate musings of Ritalin-induced-maniacs?” Truly disappointed!

For the record, I agree with the last rant, but this week’s “Rant & Rave” made up for it in spades!

Columbi-yeah
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